Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Someone shattered a urinal.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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