Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize
