I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
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