Capitaan dildo arrescate!
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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