I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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