Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
there is glitter all over my balls
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