Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
