I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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