It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
My vagina is very pro this idea
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Randomize
