I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Randomize
