I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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