I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
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