Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Your cock deserves a montage
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
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