He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
