How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Randomize
