PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize