Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
You are the jesus of drinking
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
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