I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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