Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
party gras won. party gras always wins.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
My life is pants optional.
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