Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Randomize
