i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
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