i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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