and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
