well you can't waste a boner
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
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