so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
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I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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