New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
