She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
