Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Randomize
