But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Randomize
