yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
No subtext here. People are naked.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
How drunk are you?
Completed.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Randomize
