pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
Randomize