So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
no. you can't hotbox the world.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize
