Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
