I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
this is an emotional support booty call
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize