i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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