He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
