thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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