i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Randomize
