So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize