I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
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