Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
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