i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Randomize
