her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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