You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Swine flu. Run for my life!
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Randomize
