love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize
