i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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