a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
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