...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
