i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
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