Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
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