If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
