So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize
