I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
